What conscience?

The debate about whether MP's should be allowed a free vote on the frankenmouse bill is in full swing and as usual the billion pound medical industry media machine has swung into action. Not withstanding the clever planting of the usual surge of Miracle cure life saving potential treatment stories. They still fill us with fear with wordss like cancer, lukemia and altziemers. Havent we heard all these arguments for the past 40 years while we pour millions into the charity pot of organisations like cancer research UK. God bless em they intent to spend £400,000,000 pounds on research this year and tell us it proves they are working harder. Instead they continue to spend it making rats and mice better instead of humans. have you noticed cancer is getting worse? The latest frankenmouse enabled a mouse to get a cold so that it too could be cured, you see mice dont get colds. Despite all your charitable giving animal tested drugs fail at the human stage in 95% of cases after years of work. The BBC (Britains Big Coverup) was keen to share our misery at missing a days racing at Cheltenham (20 mins on peak news) which left little time to talk about the fact that one of the worlds biggest drug manufacturers was being charged with manslaughter over its misuse of prescription medication research.

After all that how come no one stopped to concider that an MP who is elected by you to represent your interests is expected to resign from his £60,000 plus expenses job if he decides to represent you and not the government. Standard practice by all accounts, thats what you are voting for.

Its standard practice to resign if you vote against the governments bill. just wanted to repeat that so its clear. Therefore by default all power rests with the vert top tear of policy makers and will remain unchallenged while we are all busy standing outside in the freezing cold having a fag.. Is it just me...?

The John Lewis Account

If you didn't have your pitchforks at the ready from the latest round of revelations you will now. Since MP's and the speaker were caught with their hands in the till recently they chose to discuss the matter inanely until it went away. Instead of talking about the crime that was committed they prefer to talk about the law itself.
Now its been revealed that we may get to see all their claims from 2004... Makes you wonder what went on in 2003 eh? Before the shock of that and before you light those torches one MP said "we are being made to feel like crooks" that's because you are. (writs to the usual address and see you in court)
Its now been revealed that the honourable gentleman can claim up to 23,000 quid on a whole range of luxury goods. But there is a simple solution of course and technology has the answer how about just employing a department to upload the whole lot to web pages for perusal by their bosses at any time. By bosses I mean you and me of course and while they are at it why not also put all the party donations on there you too, you could even put links to their business interests to. It would be a system to be proud of and for a fraction of the cost of an MP's second home. In fact I will email the PM right away and see what he thinks.

If you can be bothered here's the highlights of the list, maybe you could print it off and use it to light your torch before we storm Westminster (After getting an appointment of course)

Air conditioning unit - £299.99
Bed - £1,000.00
Bookcase/cabinet - £500.00
Carpet - £35.00 per square metre
Carpet fitting - £6.50 per square metre
Dining table - £600.00
Dishwasher - £375.00
Drawer chest (five) - £500.00
Dressing table - £500.00
Dry cleaning - both personal and household [items] are allowable within reasonable limits
Food mixer - £200.00
Freestanding mirror - £300.00
Fridge/freezer combi - £550.00
Gas cooker - £650.00
Hi-fi/stereo - £750.00
Installation of new bathroom - £6,335.00
Installation of new kitchen - £10,000.00
Lamp table - £200.00
Nest of tables - £200.00
Recordable DVD - £270.00
Rugs (each) - £300.00
Shredder - £50.00
Sideboard - £795.00
Suite of furniture - £2,000.00
Television set - £750.00
Tumble dryer - £250.00
Underlay (basic) - £6.99 per square metre
Wardrobe - £700.00
Washer dryer - £500.00
Washing machine - £350.00
Wooden flooring/carpets - £35.00 per square metre
Workstation - £150.00

They wealthy leave and we get richer

If the wealthy do start to leave Britain you will get richer in more ways than one. They say we have to be very careful here how we treat the rich and by definition brainy people in our society because if you think you can start asking them to contribute to the society they live in they can get pretty upset. They may decide to go and live somewhere else and then what would we do, a brain drain and a money drain.

Firstly lets define the relationship between brain and wealth. I can't because there isn't one. Professors and academics are not finding themselves sitting on yachts enjoying the wealth of their labours, they are busy working like the rest of us. Inventing new syndromes or things to be afraid of or excited about. Like Number crunching Nostradamus's the profits of doom spend years working out how long it was going to be before the sun burns out or we all die of aids.

So by definition the rich are not doing that much in the brain department we can be sure of that. Yes but they are our captains of industry the people who create wealth and jobs. So you don't know anyone on your estate who is making a living and creating a good business. When the brains leave we are all going to stand around wondering how to fulfill our needs without global brands like Tesco or Costa to tell us what we need? nope.

But what about the money, we need their money and investment or we will all become poor. OK lets put ten guys in a room and say about eight of us have around 5 to ten quid each. another guy has half a million pounds and another has got say a million. But they say nasty things about him and he leaves the room. once he has gone then is everyone in the room richer or poorer? They are richer of course from the top down. All those with the fivers and tenners have relatively more money in the rooms economy and the second richest guy is now the richest.

What about jobs, we need the jobs. They seriously expect us to believe that if we upset someone who spends very little time here anyway that they are going to up and go to Sweden. Not only that they are going to take all their coffee shops, aeroplanes, oil rigs or whatever it is with them. They can't and if they did then number two richest guy will buy em and damn cheap too and just for fun he would then have to pay more wages to the rest. Because everyone else is a bit wealthier now he has gone.

Result is they leave and we get richer, real people get richer

Thief me? No I forgot!

I am a really nice guy honestly I really am. I can tell you loads of people who really like me and I mean loads. I even do a good job and I mean a really good job when I am at work. I do some work for charity too. Now I know I walked out of a shop the other day with a bottle of wine without paying but I can explain. It was an oversight on my part, that's all. I am doing two jobs at the moment and I was focusing on my work rather than thinking about stopping at the till to pay for the wine. Anyway to be fair its all so bloody complicated these days what with automated tills and the like. Our time would be better spent reviewing the rules so we know who has to pay for what rather than wasting my time on this nonsense. I wasn't even sure I had to pay because I thought my wife did that. Lots of people steal from shops you know oh yes and before you start having a go at me you should realise that I am being made a scapegoat for all those other people who steal all sorts of things. Its just a witch hunt pure and simple and its all because I'm working class. Making a mountain out of a molehill that's for sure. I have agreed not to go into the shop again for at least two weeks which is punishment enough so there is obviously no reason to waste police time. To be fair I go in that wine shop all the time and see people who do a worse job than me buying much nicer wine than me. Maybe if I earned more money then it would not come to this. I am not like those politicians........ Thieving B***ards

I'm a Prat, I'm an MP

Lets break this country into two groups for a moment. First of all there's all of us and for the sake of argument we will call them the taxpayers. Then there's group two who are the government who are also taxpayers as individuals. Now as a group the Government don't have any money at all really. Its all taxpayers money and they just move it around a bit. For example one person has no kids so they take some of their money and give it to someone who has got kids. Because they need it more? Look stop being silly and pay attention that has got nothing to do with it. So back to the government, they also look after the taxpayers assets say things like council buildings, the royal family etc oh and council houses. Well that's all so far so good but they decided to sell them. But who to, well they sold them to the taxpayers. Yes the people who already owned them bought them again. Its OK because its still taxpayers money. But then things get bad and no one has anywhere to live and all the houses have been sold. So here's the clever bit. The government are going to look pretty bad if no one can buy his tiny little bit of England and you know what happens when the people get pissed. (See Theory of politics) So they offer to pay half for essential workers to get on the property ladder. Genius. Essential worker Trans: majority of government employees on low pay and we want to keep it that way They are using our money to prop up the mortgage market and appease ESSENTIAL workers and everyone is happy. Because what happens if no one can climb the ladder. well the people at the top of the ladder can't climb up either. Problem solved
It reminds me of the apple mac adds

"Hello I'm a prat"

"Hello I'm an MP"

"I'd like some help getting on the housing ladder"

"I'm an MP I can help by lending you half the equity till you can afford the rest"

"You mean I get half a house"

"kind of yes"

"Who owns the other half"

"I do"

"Who lends me the equity"

"I do"

"Hang on where are you going to get the money to lend me?"

"I have lots of money, its taxpayers money and the money from selling all those counsel houses to you"

"Hang on so aren't I a taxpayer?"

"Well yes"

"So you sold my house back to me then you are going to use the money that I pay you to lend me half of my own house?"

"EER yes that's right"

"Wow thanks"

The Cynics Wife Theory of Politics

The power of people comes in huge upsurges of condemnation, aggression and appeasement. The political world is upside down and self centred and in general the people have very little part to play in the running of their affairs. So should we wish to build a hospital or show compassion for one of our citizens then these things can be achieved through struggle, unrest and often violence. The riots in Manchester and Liverpool being a case in point where the peoples unrest resulted in violence which resulted in appeasement in the shape of regeneration schemes set to keep them all occupied for years to come. A tiny investment of £60 million pounds, a drop in the ocean. Order restored for the cost of a couple of harrier jump jets and a handful of missiles. Just so that our political system can maintain the status quo and let good people do good things.

So lets say you are very, very wealthy and you would like to get even wealthier by doing things that are not very nice. Lets say you want to build a superstore on a beauty spot or expand an airport polluting the Sky's. What if you could make even more billions of pounds by selling harmless or harmfull drugs to the citizens. Maybe you want to make money proving they work in the first place through flawed evidence. Well thats all well and good but your fellow man is not going to be rioting in the street to support you are they. Your on your own... Unless. nah. Unless you could buy some friends. Not normal friends but big friends, like powerful political friends. Ah the answer. Party politics yes you could give some of your millions to them in numerous ways. Thats it.



Thats the Cynics Wife Theory of politics. Hence our political system dictates that "We are bound to have a government which works against the wishes of the majority"